seeing is believing . as much as i don't wanna believe ,its coming true . my life now is like twilight , new moon , eclipse . what happen there is exactly what is happening now . but i might not face the happy ever after side . I'm just going through the down side of the story . i had to put on a fake smile just to show that I'm alright . deep inside of me . i felt the urgency to cry out loud and just scream my heart out .
not everybody understands me . he doesn't know the whole thing and I'm just telling parts and parts of it . when i said goodbye . i tried not to put you in my life anymore . as it has brought me more painful memories . i was wrong in many ways . and i do admit I'm guilty . maybe this is just the way god punish me for my doings . but if he is . why did he made me met you ? . as crazy as it seems i just wished i had never met you .
but looking through all the memories we had . just kills the moment of regret . with that i have to apologize for all the wrong I've done and i hope i wont repeat the same mistake again . if only you knew . that what they said . if only you knew what I'm really going through and what I'm really feeling .but what the heck you will never find out anyways .
I'm going . leaving in a couple of months to come . and I'm gonna make the best out of it . i will find my ways and no one can ruin the dignity that i have . though i don't want to but i have to for the sake of myself . this seems to mean goodbye . and after that i might never see you again . cause if you wont do it then i will .
gd night .