Monday, September 29, 2008

an early morning's coffee

i woke up early and idk why xD . anyways so i figured to just blog early though the day haven't end yet but who cares . i might edit it and add in more stuff to it . anyways i got up my brother isn't going to school today ( which isn't fair ) then hmmm nothing much to say really . but i saw this book and they have verses of love or something like that . I'll give you a few

i miss prita . its not so lively as before

what's in a name ? that which we call a rose
by any other name would smell as sweet
so romeo would , were he not romeo called .

william shakespeare ( i don't get this one )

the way you let your hand rest in mine ,my
bewitching sweet heart,fills me with
happiness . it is the perfection of confiding
love . everything you do , the little unconscious
things in particular , charms me and increases
my sense of nearness to you, identification
with you, till my heart is overflowing .

woodrow wilson

when she saw him , she felt a stab in her
heart that persons who have never been dazed
by love take for a metaphor.

abel hermant

the best and most beautiful things in the
world cannot be seen or even touched.
they must be felt by the heart .

helen keller

all this stuff is sweet . but there is more but I'm not gonna type it all out . xD not like anyone would read it anyways . I'll blog later after my day so tata for now !

continue ...

my day haven't ended yet . i met up with philippe in the morning . to add some spice to my life . LOL a little girl's secret . hmmm i dance with him at first . then later went swimming . and camwhore a little in the playground . sorry i don't have the pictures with me yet . but I'll get them soon . it was fun being with him . throughout my studying days when there is only 12 more days to sit for PMR . I'm officially together with philippe .but not telling you all anything more . its nice to have someone who cares about me . though now i cant really text him due to my unpaid bills . its really annoying but he and i have to bare with it .

i just have to concentrate these few days and after that I'm free from all this study ( for awhile ) then I'll be off to my new school next year . so I'm going to attend every event that will be held in the school . :D might even try out for talent time with the beta's xD hopefully . anyways that's all for tonight .

see yea !

Sunday, September 28, 2008

never give up !

this morning my dad woke me up at 7 to work out . though i was awake
i felt lazy to go so early so i said NO . i doze off on my bed till 9:30 then
got ready to go to the gym . i was looking high and low for him but he was
no where to be found . so i thought to go myself . then i realize that the bicycle
was missing so i walked there . then spot my dad and he gave me the bicycle .
when i was about to work out these old ladies were staring at me . haha it felt
weird . then i just stretched and work out a little . cause this old lady was hogging

the tread mill . anyways i just figured i left .

failed attempt no. 1

failed attempt no. 2

slightly better than the first 2 :P

got home watch the MUMMY 3 and ate breakfast at the same time . went to my room studied for awhile . did some exercises and here i am . bored as hell but i cant wait till
this nonsense is all over . then i can spend wonderful days in a camp . wow . philippe
says I'm spoilt . cause i refused to go there . hmmm end of day perhaps .

great dresses awaits ! i wish i can have them their gorgeous

gotta go ciaos ! .

Saturday, September 27, 2008

happy times !

I'm seriously bored . cant wait till pmr is totally over . till then i will express my boredum haha . nawwh just kidding . okay yesterday i saw this pretty person . I'm not gonna say the name but you can give a guess . on my chatterbox . haha winner gets a kiss from the person .


happy holidays people ! especially to the malays

okay pmr is near . study study study

me and lin went to the gym yesterday . we were suppose to take pictures

but i guess we forgot . nvrm there is always a next time


i will be by your side till the time comes for me to leave . never again will i see your face . your smile .and laughter . it will all just end and later forgotten . love is nothing but a feeling . till i met you . you've shown me what it really meant . im not sure how long it will last . but i know one day he will be with me till my time comes . when im old . he said i will never leave you . and i will always be there for you .

the meaning when a guy commits his love for you

he will die for you . he is willing to give up everything for you .

later people ! i will be back after pmr . i think . byee

xoxo love yea lots !

Friday, September 19, 2008

finding each and every puzzle

i know I'm suppose to study now but I'm just in the mood for blogging .. :D
ok hmm lets see
on Wednesday philippe , derrick and i went to the gym near my house to work out
but guess what we only used the gym for maybe half and hour or so
i took candid pictures so shhh..
after that we went swimming haha it was ok
at least i wasn't stuck at home just studying all day
the weird part was that my brother and my mom came to the pool and swim too
they thought I'm dating 2 guys at the same time
haha it was awkward
then later we left for home and so did they
cause the pool was getting too crowded
today was a bummer ..
i felt so tired
just don't know why
then eelin and i are suppose to work out in the school gym today
but i drag her out of it cause i felt tired xD
I'm sorry dear ! i didn't wanted to be alone haha
don't be mad yea
i hid her clothes haha
then i got home feeling all bushed up just sat in front of the tv
and watch for an hour
then here i am blogging haha
so far this is a little new to me
and it feels weird
well i feel different in a good way
oh well ..
anyways here are some pictures to enjoy well its nothing much but i hope its something

in the tiny gym :)
derrick and philippe if you can spot them
he can carry weights .
good night ! xoxo..

Sunday, September 14, 2008

everything i have ever wanted was to be with you

today . i promised to be myself and just study the hell out of me for pmr and nothing is or will spoil my concentration . sadly after this I'm just gonna have my last few months in srikl then I'm leaving . i will come back but its not for long . i hope i will be remembered and never forgotten . i apologize to my readers for reading my sad stories but this is what I'm going through . so far i have started to think of you less and looking towards reality . well this is life . nothing is fair in this world . so i better start facing the real world .

cause nothing can last no matter how much you want it . sometimes you think you have found the guy that can last you forever . but it doesn't always turn out the way its suppose to be . i have become fond of seeing you everywhere and idk why . its like i would always see you everyday but you'll never look and me and neither would i . not a hi . not a smile . just a nobody passing through the hallway .

but you know at the end you will loose something more than you thought you knew . and when you start regretting you cant change a thing . i feel weird these couple of days . like I'm not myself . i might not be like the other girls that is only showing the best sides of themselves but you haven't seen everything yet . you have seen every part of my personality . anyways its time for me to log out .

the three big words is a very strong word to say . so an advice don't give up so soon . then you'll end up like me . people has always seen the best side of me but here is where i express everything out . every bad thing I'm facing ends up here . just to release my feelings towards whatever it is . so whoever is reading this don't think of me badly or look at it the wrong way . its just a feeling nothing more and nothing less .

nights . love you guys

Sunday, September 7, 2008

remember why your holding on to them

nothing much has been happening lately . except that engkit and i officially broke up . well there were reasons to it . hmm it didn't really work out between me and him and we were walking our separate ways so i suppose i was best being single . well and try to enjoy life . so far I'm studying as hell . till pmr is over i will not stop then once this whole exam is over I'm going to continue finishing reading the final book BREAKING DAWN . haha well cant wait for that . and so as the up coming movie of twilight . though went the year is through I'm gonna miss my mates , friends , EVERYTHING . so I'm gonna do my best to make these last few months the best months to spend with my friends .

ok gonna stop talking about that now . lately I've been working out haha . with eelin and well during my free time i will do it myself . just to keep in shape . nothing to detailed . the older post was abit emo-ish well . i had my time to forget about it . so far its working out for me . slowly though . maybe in time that will come i will realise that he wasn't really the one for me . though he will still be special . but i will find my ways to get around it and just put it in the past . not gonna be blogging alot these few days due to my pmr . but i will promise to blog more after this .

anyways gotta go . study study study . LOL and goodluck to you guys that are taking pmr , spm and the final exam . good night .


Thursday, September 4, 2008

i'm living a lie

a saying from jean-ni , it meant alot . just exactly the expression that i wanted to tell you a long time ago . but i didnt had the guts to . but now its just to late to say anything cause , you said i can never be yours . so let the tears settle before i do anything else .

And i know that you hope for longer goodbyes,

embracing for forever and falling in your eyes.

So I bite my lip,

and hold back those three short words.
Because I don’t want the silence,

and I can’t stand getting hurt.

It was never supposed to be like this.

I wasn't supposed to get attached.

I thought I had control over my feelings.

I'm slowly beginning to see I control nothing,

you control me.

So one last touch and then you'll go and we'll pretend that it meant something so much more but it was vile,

and it was cheap and you are beautiful but you don't mean a thing to me.

I wish I could bottle up the feeling I get when you smile and keep it forever.

Your grammar was incorrect,but those were the sweetest sentences I have ever heard.

To you I'm just some girl you met one summer.

A girl that you just go to when you have no one else to talk to.

That girl that lives so far away that you never have to see or talk to if you don't want to.

But to me, you are so much more.

You are the boy that I gave my whole heart to and you didn't even notice or care.

That boy that I always had the most amazing times with.

The one that I could never get out of my head.

I miss how we talked,

for hours on end,but most of all, more than anything,

I miss being just friends.

There are some days where you just have to hold yourself together because there is no one to glue you back together if you fall apart.
Its a shame that two hearts can be so attached but they can't be together.

Your head in your hands and this is my cue,

if three words could heal you,I would only speak two.

Your eyelids grow heavy and this is my cue,if three words could heal you,

I'd speak only two.

I ran up the door,

closed the stairs,

put on my prayers and said my pajamas,

i turned off the bed and hopped into the light all because you kissed me goodnight.

Don't take my heart and put it on a shelf.

Here's the thing,I've already gone crazy once.

I know what my limits are.When everything is wrong,

I'll come talk to you. You make things alright when I'm feeling blue.

You are such a blessing and I wont be messing .With the one thing that brings light to all of my darkness.

You're my best friend and I love you,

and I love you.

Yes I do .There is no other one who can take your place I feel happy inside when I see your face I hope you believe me cause I speak sincerely.

And I mean it when I tell you that I need you.

You're my best friend and I love you, and I love you.

Yes I do I'm here right beside you I will never leave you and I feel the pain you feel when you start crying

the feeling of hate + love = complications

I'll never speak to you again till my tears has dry ,

because i will no longer be happy without your presence

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

the life from a ending to a new beginning

seeing is believing . as much as i don't wanna believe ,its coming true . my life now is like twilight , new moon , eclipse . what happen there is exactly what is happening now . but i might not face the happy ever after side . I'm just going through the down side of the story . i had to put on a fake smile just to show that I'm alright . deep inside of me . i felt the urgency to cry out loud and just scream my heart out .

not everybody understands me . he doesn't know the whole thing and I'm just telling parts and parts of it . when i said goodbye . i tried not to put you in my life anymore . as it has brought me more painful memories . i was wrong in many ways . and i do admit I'm guilty . maybe this is just the way god punish me for my doings . but if he is . why did he made me met you ? . as crazy as it seems i just wished i had never met you .

but looking through all the memories we had . just kills the moment of regret . with that i have to apologize for all the wrong I've done and i hope i wont repeat the same mistake again . if only you knew . that what they said . if only you knew what I'm really going through and what I'm really feeling .but what the heck you will never find out anyways .

I'm going . leaving in a couple of months to come . and I'm gonna make the best out of it . i will find my ways and no one can ruin the dignity that i have . though i don't want to but i have to for the sake of myself . this seems to mean goodbye . and after that i might never see you again . cause if you wont do it then i will .

gd night .