sometimes i wonder why i care for people that could potentially hurt me .. i know people come and go but if thats a rule then i want to find a way to break it .. because i cant stand the fact that after all the memories everything is forgotten and the priorities are no longer set as the way it was before .. everything changes , and this annoys me to the max .. I've met alot of new people every time i change institutions , join new activities and so on .. which i then realize that its temporary and not permanent or partly permanent .. i think thats my greatest fear to all the decision making that i choose to make in my life ..
dont know why that is but its my biggest weakness .. its the truth that i could never accept .. i dont see why i should care and others dont .. i cant stand it that people just accept this as a way of life and not fight for something that matters to them .. to this day i'm defeated by that truth .. letting go , treasure the past and hope to make a better future .. This monk named Ajahn Brahmavamso once said if you let go of the things you desire you'll find peace and happiness .. I suppose i desire to always have the people i love with me but everyone knows thats never gonna happen .. so what do i do ? let it go ... if i say i'm ok sooner or later i will be , because thats the positive thinking i should have when times like these do come
now all that is left is the pictures ..